The Flys - Holiday Man

It's been awhile since I've listened to these guys, and the whole album rocks - but this song is by far my favorite on the album: Got You (Where I Want You)



Hope you enjoy.

Some Macro Photos

Here are some pictures I took with my Optek 10X Macro Lens (HD2 platinum series). It was advertised for a great price on an online shopping website (it starts with an "A"). I've been wanting a macro lenses for a longtime but I can't afford the prices, so when I stumbled on this lenses attachment - I thought for this price why not. You focus the lense by moving closer or farther away from the object. Since I'm not the steadiest, I needed lots of light to get fast speeds to help with shutter shake.

As soon as I get better...

Well, the flu went away, but some other nastiness moved in...so, now it's an antibiotic and cough syrup. I cannot wait to get healthy again. I managed one whopping day of work last week.

I'm trying to have more possibilies then the polite "no thank yous" I've gotten this week. I'm partially relieved because I don't really want to travel across country in the winter. I'm partially quite sad because I can't seem to get past resume "looks". The companies are looking, but they aren't calling to interview. Speaking of interviewing, the wife agreed to practise with me, especially since I haven't job interviewed in over 8 years. I'm trying to stay positive...like it takes six months, the right door just hasn't opened yet, my skill set doesn't really suck.

Ugh - what if I've gotten it wrong, and I've sold my house, told my supervisor and well now just about everyone knows, and I can't find a job.

Ugh - then I tell myself to quit being negative, this is the right path, it's just going to take time, the right door at the right time...sigh...

So, I'm wondering when the right time will be - oh hey, yeah maybe I should quit trying to control when this is going to happen.

But, back to as soon as I get better - more veggies, more exercise, less stress.

I'm Alive but Roughly Breathing

Well, I survived the flu - yesterday I felt really good and then over did it around the house...so today I feel like there's a big brick on my chest.

It looks like everybody is going back to their respective routines tomorrow (oh yeah, they caught flu-lite).

I had the strangest dream close to waking up...the cast of characters included Tommy Lee, Keith Richards, and Ricky Martin - it was all very odd and involved car chases in vintage sports cars (except for the pinto thing with no power steering that the wife was driving then had me drive) and beat up pickup trucks.

Feel Aweful

Hope everyone else has a better weekend...me, low grade fever, sore throat from hell, and chills.

Health and Weather

So, ALT, here is my Health & Weather...I'll pass this along to the other "D".

How linked my cough
to the bitter wind
At least the germs disappate
more quickly or perhaps
more quickly spread

How linked my mood
to the lack of sun
Though this gray be not sad
introspective perhaps or maybe
anticipation awaiting

How linked the room of my intersanctum
to the crisp air
One had hoped perhaps
but layers, layers
prolong the excitement of skin

Signs, signs, everywhere there's signs and humor

I was going through my emails this morning, and one of my daily emails is my horoscope, here it is:
"Yes, all this waiting is probably making you absolutely crazy, and yes, you're due for the universe to toss you just one tiny bone. Now, stop whining. Nothing happens until it's supposed to happen, and no matter how hard you try, you can't change that. Deal with it."

Utterly perfect, utterly true, one has to smile and laugh at ones self sometimes.

It's going to be an odd week this one:
Monday: Dropped car off for service, standard stuff, just puts major kink in families schedule.
Tuesday: Finish root canal work. Now I'm pertified of the dentist but I can't wait to get this work finished.
Wednesday: Back to different dentist to get fit for a new crown (old one was what sent me to Tuesday dentitst in the first place). About a week later get the crown "installed".

So, come Thursday I'll either be smiles or frazzled or maybe a little of both. To have my week topped off by the bishop visiting our church Sunday. I keep thinking I don't want to go. I don't want to see this man nor hear him preach. But, part of me say that I should go. Part of me wants to introduce myself to him, and ask him point blank why he won't allow gays/lesbians into the ordination process. Part of me wonders what's the point of asking, do I want to hold the hurt that will come from that conversation.

Peace and blessings, and to anyone else with dental work this week may it all go well.

Signs, signs, everywhere there's signs

This morning while walking the dogs I asked God for a sign, basically asking if I'm following the right call. I've been feeling discouraged lately as I'm down to one "active" application out there in the nethers.

And well God does have a wonderful sense of humor...the family and I went to a local sub shop. The sub shop has TVs set-up for the enjoyment of its customers, and while sitting there I looked up at this odd commercial, I came into it near the beginning but not quite. There were all these people with shiny things reflecting the light into a neighborhood. My first thought was that they were trying to bring love into the world...but alas no they where trying to keep Monday from coming. But, for me here's God's humor - the last image is all text:

Moster.com
you're calling is calling

How sweet is that!

I EMed (Eucharistic Minister/Chalice Bearer) for only the second time today, and it was months ago since the first time and there where two priests so the flow went different then from today's with just one. And it didn't go horrid, just lots off oddness that left me feeling frazzled and a bit embaressed. Ah well, I'm sure it'll be even more months before I get to go up again. I have no idea how other team leads put their schedules together, but it isn't well thought out most of the time. But enough of complaining and embaressment.

Back to signs...quite a few years ago I went to an angel psychic out of curiousity. I don't remember much of the details now. At the time I had 4 neandrethalic angels that encircled me. A rainbow river that meant something good, and when my angels wanted to let me know that I needed to remember love that I'd see butterflies. And the only specific question I can remember asking was what was I supposed to do with my writing; the answer was that the angels would not let her see, that they had pulled a veil over the answer, that I had to figure that one out for myself. And so when I dare to believe it will be so, I've the answer now - sermons.

Much love and many blessings.

Poem

I hope murat11 doesn't mind I stole a few stanzas from his, Strange Gnus: Jazzable Sweet, and added a little of mine.

and he said,
in the darker spaces
in the darker air
in the darker whispers
of the dark dark darkened snare

and her reply slow,
oh i've been there
tangled and entwined
listen not
as a trail i do leave

and he said,
no proper names
no foreign gold
no clumsy gifts
no rough-cut wood
no tuneless songs
no happy years
no crying bench
no centered lives
no field of tears
no sprouted wings
no rebel wind
no high-pitched worry
the thick and chilly white—

and her reply slow,
what kingdom then am i

I feel like I'm leaving this unended but I've got to go.

Poem

What place has She
Institutional
Small group sessions
Through the desert and into the woods

Of my heart
What place has She
Hypocrisy
Heresy

How shall I hold Her
Precariously
Tenderly
Into now and then and possibly

What place has She
I hear her ask
Trembling
Part fear and part expectation

What's your recipe

What's your recipe?
3 parts Daring
2 parts Sensitivity
1 part Poise

Splash of Enchantment
Limit yourself to one serving. This cocktail is strong!

What's the Recipe for Your Personality?

Ok, so instead of blogging about what's on my mind - I offer this instead.

Labrynth Morning of January 01

Labrynth walk the morning of January 1, 2008.

Hope I didn't get you too dizzy :)

Resolutions, bah

No, no resolutions this year. Perhaps because I feel like I'm still learning to live in now and not hurry up and get there mode. There are so many unknowns before for me, that to not totally stress out, I can only do what I can, and the rest is up to God and myself. One of my latest discussions with my Spiritual Director was about me still being in that season of Advent, that expectant waiting. I do know I need to give myself more quiet time for reflection, more time to just be, and not always filling every spare moment with something. It's like I won't allow my mind idleness. If I'm sitting it's active sitting not just being. If I'm moving it's to get somewhere. If I'm sleeping I'm dreaming. I think I lost my off switch :-)

So on New Year's Day I officiated Morning Prayer into the great silence. I walked the labrynth with my usual speed in the glow of a rising sun [I'll post video later]. I drove home with silence. And entered my life. I am blessed with a wonderful life, and God has blessed me my entire life.

Thank you to all who are a piece of my life, much love, new journeys, and many blessings.