Monday, January 15, 2007

Theos

"Theos"

I keep hearing that God calls out to us
And if I can’t hear him then the connection is broken on my end
Well that sucks because I’m no theological technician
Where even to begin
What to repair first
My heart? My soul? My mind?

I keep hearing that God answers our prayers – pray
Lectio Devina
Centering
Pray anything
But you warn me
God doesn’t always answer our prayers
The way we expect
But always better

So I pray my mantra
So I pray to the rhythm of circular beads
So I pray and
I pray

Theos is calling but I can’t understand Him
Theos is calling

5 comments:

murat11 said...

Well, the last heap of commentary just got ditched to the cyber-heap. See how this goes.

Do you know the music of Nick Drake? Wonderful accompaniment to this fiendishly lovely weather we are having. Listening to him as I read "Theos."

Delicious perturbations lurking in that there poem of yours:

You lowercase him early and capitalize Him late. Whether meant or not, and for the moment letting go of the whole masculinity debate, those H/h's have been an internal subject of debate for me: I believe that many across the "pond" (even C. S. Lewis, if memory serves) keep the lowercase, a habit I have been experimenting with: seems to keep him closer, more inclusive, the polarizing dogs at bay. Hearing into god is more clearly (for me) a hearing into the deep/wide self, where we all live anyway, yes? Hearing "Him," (again, for me) becomes a trick of the mind, lost to the "theological technicians" (cool phrase), and the mind's taste for the polarities of despair, cynicisms, and just plain running amok...

These runnings amok, mind you, are not complaints about "Theos." They are affirmations of its courage...

Peace to the muses lurking and living on the westside...and much love...

Lee said...

Interesting prayer. Is this connection the same one that the Genesis class is discussing? It can be lost. It can also be gained. I like this one!

jsd said...

Lee: I’ve no idea what the Genesis class is discussing; an interesting coincidence I guess. Glad you liked it.

Murat11: I haven’t heard of Nick Drake, so I went over to Amazon to hear smidgens of his songs, and I can see how his music is a good fit for today – melancholy but so smooth.

Ah, the lowercase him was a typo which I like. God has been pounded into me as being male (too many early years in the clutches of Roman Catholicism ;-)) – so God is a Him/him, but I think that He was a he simply to be practical with the times that he arrived in. Society can crucify their fathers but can they crucify their mothers? And when I step outside my faith tradition beliefs God expands and becomes woman. I got this conglomeration of Judeo/Christian/New Age swirling inside – it gets a little confusing sometimes.

The poem is a lament – a yearning for, a hunger for God, but feeling so very far away from and yet so close.

Peace back at ya - much love – missed you this weekend

murat11 said...

As the ice wave gets ready to roll over us, this question raised itself with the earlier readings: who is "you" in the second stanza? God behind God? God in front of God?

Peace/out.

jsd said...

The "You" is both Robert and my experiences in the Sunday School classes - it (being "you") was meant to encompass "my" faith community. The second stanza for me is one of frustration and of hope.