I've finished all my paperwork, it's been emailed and handed in as appropriate. I didn't discover anything new about myself, which was reassuring and disappointing too. I've known myself pretty well for a long time now. It's one of the things I really like about St. Benedictine's rule of life, about time to think, about reading, about prayer, about aging. I wonder if the folks who write the report will reflect things back to me that I didn't catch in my own reflective light of the mirror. In about 2 weeks I'll head out of town for the second half, more papers to fill out and I imagine one-on-one talking time.
I've been penciled into the Bishop's early 2011 schedule, assuming the report results get to him in time, then with one day to spare the COM meets. I might be there, won't know until well the day before. I hope so, as I know y'all can imagine, just how much I hope so.
I told a fellow discerner, my train is nearing the end of the tunnel, I can see the light and traces of the station. And as I shared with a different discerner, my coracle is getting ever closer to land, just waiting for the tide to bring me in now.
I'm ready for the next Chapter, but then I need to keep reminding myself this Chapter hasn't quite finished yet, stay present, stay focused.
The Bishop suggested an emergent church book for me to read. It's good but it's not the language that speaks to my heart, so I'm very ready to get to the end of it. I am however, reading some awesome books: Encouraging the Heart (a leadership book), and The Wisdom Jesus. I'm also skimming through my emergent church books, to keep that verbiage fresh in my vocabulary.
After my evaluation visit, I'll put a strong focus on out-loud articulating of why this and not that, what does xyz mean to me, who is x to me, what do I feel etc. to. My practice opus is getting longer; it's my placeholder of thoughts already articulated, now penciled all over with changes and additions.
And just in case: A early Happy Thanksgiving to you all and safe travels.
Friday, November 19, 2010
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